Don’t Rot the Man’s Bones!

A virtuous and worthy wife is a crowning joy to her husband, but she who makes him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones. - Proverbs 12:4

First, let us look deeper into some of the key words in this powerful Scripture.

Virtuous – Chayil (khah’ - yil) and means; a force, an army, strength, able, substance, worthy.

Crown – atar (aw-tar’) and means; encircle, crown, compass

Ashamed - buwsh (boosh) and means; to make disappointed, put to shame, confound, become dry, to contradict or refute, to bring ruin.

I think many times, as wives, we do not really take the time to truly understand the role we play in the lives of our husbands. God did not put the man at the head because He thought less of the woman. He loves us the same. However, He needed to create an atmosphere of order in the home. So, He Chose the man to lead and the woman to submit and follow.

However, with the role we have as wives, there is an incredible responsibility that in most cases is missed. It is often missed because as women we can not get past the word “submit,” and the annoyance that word brings!

Look at this Scripture though.

Hmmm…

We are a force in our husband’s life. Let me share the Scripture with you now that we have clarity on some of the words used in it…

A strong, able, and worthy woman is a crowning compass of joy to her husband, but she who makes him shamed, disappointed, and contradicts him is a rottenness to his bones.

WOW! We are a HUGE influence in our husband’s life. And, when we do not step into our roles as wives properly, we are a hindrance to our husbands. We are a bad influence. When we argue, fight, refuse to submit, boss, verbally bash privately or publicly, disrespect, and treat our husband in any way that is out of alignment with God’s Word, we are hurting them. We are ROTTING THEIR BONES!

Hey, I did not write the Word. God inspired men what to write. God made sure that we all know everything we need to live happy, peaceful, and joy-filled lives. His Word does not adapt itself with the times. His Word does not change to fit our needs or the culture. It just IS. We all have choices…we can obey and be blessed or we can disobey and bring ruin to ourselves and our husbands.

Benefits of obedience:

- blessings
- allows God to WORK in our husband’s life and heart
- helps our husband BE what God created him to be
- trains our children to be God obeyers NOT the cultures lackey

What does the fruit of Disobedience Bring?

- a ruined husband with rotten bones
- divorce
- hindrance or our husbands spiritual walk
- trains our children to life selfish worldly lives

To put it bluntly, we need to stop waiting for our husband’s to fulfill OUR needs and OBEY what God wants US to do as wives. NOT based on the performance of our husbands. We need to DO what God says to do BECAUSE God SAID it and HE knows best!

When we let go of what we want and do what God wants, then and ONLY then will we truly have all that God wants us to have. Then and ONLY then will God actually have the room and ability to WORK in our husbands hearts and help our marriages.

We cannot go on expecting God to change them and we are not even willing to do what God has said to do!

Let’s Pray;

Daddy God, please forgive me for being a selfish wife. Please forgive me for unrealistic expectations, and expecting my husband to fulfill my needs. Help me to turn to You and allow You to be my source for everything. Please forgive me for being stubborn and expecting my husband to change before I will. Help me to love him. Help me to obey You and what You want regardless of my husband’s behavior. Help me to NOT be a rottenness to his bones. Help me to be a crowning joy to him that helps him to be all that You created him to be. Help me to love him unselfishly. Show me how I can honor, encourage, and delight my husband. Thank You for Your Word, Lord. Thank You for not changing with the times. Thank You for being the same yesterday, today, and forever. Help me to be consistent in all I do. Praise You Lord. You are worthy of my obedience, love, and worship. Thank You for loving me. In Jesus Mighty Life Giving Name. Amen!

Your Homework:

Study the following Scriptures:

* Proverbs 14:1
* Proverbs 15:1-4
* Proverbs 16:7
* Luke 6:41-42
* 1 Corinthians 13
* 1 John 4:7-21

Memorize: Be gentle and forbearing with one another, and if one has a grievance against another, readily pardon each other; even as the Lord has freely forgiven you, so must you also forgive. – Colossians 3:13

Application: If you really want a happy, healthy, GOD pleasing marriage, then you must begin to look inward and not at your husband. Take an inventory of your thought life, how you think and speak about your husband, repent, and begin to seek God about how YOU should change.

Copyright © Lara Velez

In His Love and Service,
Lara ;)

Note: All Scripture is taken from the Amplified Bible, unless otherwise stated. Also, the Webster’s dictionary, Random House Thesaurus, Strong’s Concordance, and/or The Complete New Testament Word Study may have been used.

Copyright © Lara Velez, Moms of Faith, All Rights Reserved