Advice for Single Moms: Have a Plan

Sadness can strike at the most unexpected times when you are a single mom. With Father’s Day right around the corner, the news of a Father-Daughter Dance or a church outing for dads and kids is enough to push you right over the edge into tears. I know. I’ve been there. In fact, it can still feel like I’ve been punched in the gut when I know an event is occurring that my children cannot participate in because they do not have a father who lives locally.

For moms with kids but no dad in the picture, emotional pain can strike at any time. Couples and two-parent families are all around us, and we can experience the loss of the family unit over and over again. Often times, the pain that we feel as mothers, knowing that our child cannot participate in something because they do not have a father present, is worse than even the pain and loss the child experiences.

It’s a good thing that I’ve discovered a way to combat these negative emotions.

Advice for Single Moms

Have a Plan.

1. Make friends with parents with children in similar situations to yours. There may be people you already know, or you may have to seek out families in similar circumstances. Your church or another local church may have a program specifically for Single Parents. Join it. You may even find single parents among your children’s friends at school. Get to know them, serve them, spend time together. If they don’t know Christ, what a wonderful opportunity to be a witness of His love to them.

2. Once you’ve found at least one other family, plan activities together. Attempt to plan them at the same time as any activities that your children can’t participate in without a father present. This will give you, and your children, something fun to look forward to; and help mitigate the stabbing pain in your chest.

3. Involve your family. If your children are blessed with grandparents, uncles, or other male family members, talk with them about stepping in to spend time with your child and possibly accompany them to any father oriented events.

There are situations in life that we cannot understand until we have walked through them. Single moms know the pain and loss of raising children, often times, all alone. Although our children’s earthly father may not be present or, at least, not much–our children do have a Heavenly Father Who is the Father to the fatherless. Each day as I spend time praying for my children, I ask God to be their Father in a very present way. With all my heart I can testify, God has been a Father to my children.

Do you have advice for single moms who have to raise their kids without a dad in the home?

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