Waiting for Christmas

Anticipation.  Anticipay… yay… tion!   Ohhhhh, it’s making me wait!

Carly Simon.  What a song!  Can you hear it?  Wait, I’ll sing it for you again:  “Anticipation, it’s keeping me waiy… yay… yay… yai-ai-ting!”  (Oooops!  Too loud?  Here comes Dan.  He’s heard enough!)

But not me!  I LOVE this song.  Sure, I know it is not a Christmas song but I’m really thinking of calling up Carly and asking if she’ll include it on her next holiday album.  Someone should.  Don’t you think?

I mean really!  Of all the crazy things we have had to wait on this year!  The list is endless.  From daily things like school report cards, email, the market, to more major life events like Caity’s (our recent college graduate) job pursuit and offer, IEP evaluations, school fairs, snow days, to really crazy waits by the mailbox.  Yes, waiting for snail mail to deliver news from the Veteran’s Administration concerning benefits for Dan’s illness, Parkinson’s Disease.   Aaaaargh!

With Christmas Eve just a few days away, are your kids also about to burst at the seams?  Mine are!   I really think I may have to take Isaac to the Emergency Room; the wait is so unbearable for him.  It’s the same around birthday time too.

Kinda makes every day just seem like one big, long, w-a-i-t!  Thinking back, there were some waits that were just unbearable; like after a doctor told Dan and I that we would never be able to make our own babies, then the time we waited to get news of our first pregnancy with Violet.  What a roller coaster until then!  If you have ever had to watch your cycle so closely in order to conceive a baby, that wait can make you go bonkers, doesn’t it?

Hospital waits are the-worse! Like waiting for infant Violet, the child we went through so much to conceive, waiting for her bilirubin levels to drop.  Or, the 20 year wait for Grandma’s doctor to finally tell her she was cancer free?  The wait over a bowl of Cocoa Puffs while Dan’s cardiologist installed an ICD in his heart.  Another major wait was after Dan was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease.  Wondering if Social Security would “award” disability benefits was unbearable.

But you know what?  Without this wait, I never would have seen what faith really is.  While I freaked out, it was Dan that said “God will provide.”

Why all this “waiting” anyway?  Because “God will provide.”  He provides for me daily with life “stuff” that ever increases my faith until ultimately I am stronger and able to conquer tomorrow’s trials and challenges.  In a way, this holy season of Advent makes a little more sense.

“Advent,” which means “coming” or “arrival”, signifies the celebration of the birth of Jesus AND the anticipation of His return.  To me, it is us playing out God’s promise not just at Christmas time, but all year long.  Like I know in my heart that heaven “waits” for me, until then I am blessed with the right now; I’ll “stay right here because these are the good ole days”!

The good ole days to enjoy my hott-hubby Dan and our family; to savour today’s health; to enjoy the blessings of babies you were told you would never have.

These children; as I watch them encounter their own struggles I am reminded that God has entrusted them to me and I am called to be His steward to watch and raise His precious gifts.  It’s a hard job, isn’t it?  Especially knowing that there will be times when they, too, will encounter not only health issues, relationship worries, and financial woes.  As a Christian, even at six they will also be called on to explain and defend their beleifs.  Scares the “be-geeebbies” out of me.  Really, it does.

So right now, for these ‘good ole days’ of Christmas with the kids, I plan to hold on a little tighter, squeeze them a little longer.  When they decide to rest a moment in my lap, I cherish this because I know tomorrow they will be all grown up.  When they run back to the door for one more kiss, it doesn’t matter if we’re late for school.  I want to steal every moment to snuggle with them while they will let me, talk about the day, count each freckle, and braid their hair.  Right now, I never want to let go.  This is the best Christmas gift ever for this mommy, because the unknown that lies ahead for any child, I can’t stop thinking….

How did Mary ever do this?  How?

“‘I am the Alpha and the Omega [the first and the last, the beginning and the end],’ says the Lord God, who is and who was and who is to come, the Almighty”  Revelations 1:8 & 22:13

Copyright © Angie Hott, Moms of Faith, All Rights Reserved