Holiday Dieting Humor

Once again, it’s that time of year where diet and eating healthy goes out the window. There are so many tips and people with advice…like; “eat before you go to parties or drink lots of water to fill yourself up”. Seriously, is that any fun? Forget all that! Instead, let’s indulge in some humor because if you can’t beat ’em, then you might as well  join ’em!

Keep in mind…these “tips” are just for fun! ;)

Holiday Eating — Self Indulgence Tips

Vegetable and Fruit Plate

Raw, crispy, healthy carrot and celery sticks and the multicolored fruit plate. Yum! Oh boy! Eat them alone or dip them in low-calorie home made dips. Notice how this plate is the smallest and not in the middle of the table? Yeah, well, there’s a reason for that. Who goes to parties to eat raw vegetables over chips? Fruits on the other hand is refreshing, but your sweet tooth is not craving wholesome fruits.


Alcohol, eggnog, carbonated drinks, fruit juices, yummy punches…and water. It’s such a hard choice isn’t it? Water instead of eggnog? Seriously!?


Dark meat versus white meat that is the question. Dark meat (higher in fat and calories) is so tender and moist… White meat (lower in fat and calories) ‘can’ be juicy, it can also be dry (most of the time) which is why there’s gravy to moisten it. What the heck? Put plenty of each on your plate and cover it with gravy. Let the gravy spill over and seep into the mashed potatoes because gravy and mash are so good together. Don’t forget the cranberry sauce. That sounds sooooo much better than a fruit plate.


What? Skipping dessert? No way! Melt in your mouth shortbread cookies, mincemeat tarts, cheesecake, candies, chocolate or another glorious bit of sweetness…this is heaven. Sample each little dessert you can find because a little bit of this and a little bit of that won’t hurt your waistline too badly. Use your waist band as a gauge to stop eating. If it’s a bit too tight, you’re almost done, but if it leaves a waist band imprint, then no more dessert for you. Wait an hour and then you can have some more! LOL!

Around the Table

When it comes to being social, the best place to be is around the food table. You’ll always find great conversation starters there. “Ooh, that looks delish!” or “That’s made with heavy whipping cream and mascarpone cheese.” Yeah, those are the ones you want taste test not the low-fat banana pudding pops. Boring! Save yourself a trip and hang around the table because you know you can’t stop at eating until you’ve tried almost everything you’ve set your eyes on.

All kidding aside–while this is all for fun, the real tip is…

The key is pacing yourself and to indulge moderately. Be sure to PLAN ahead and be ready for a little healthy indulgence this holiday season! Your eyes are most likely bigger than your stomach, but listen to the signals of what your body is saying. You’ll know when you have had enough. You just have to be aware of what you’re doing, what you’re putting on your plate and in essence, what you’re putting in your mouth.

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