I always thought of myself as a woman of faith. I have had my share of trials and through them always maintained the spirit that God is still running the show and He will prevail. With all my needs, wants, and desires, I trusted the Lord or so I thought. I have come to realize that my faith was often misplaced.
Not long ago I was in a car accident. The accident injured my knee and over the past month or so I have been dealing with limited movement and ability. This occurrence did not shake my faith. A knee will recover and even if it does not recover entirely I retain the ability to walk. My car was fixed showing no evidence of damage. It was at that moment that I wondered why such senseless things occur. I live in a world where seemingly senseless things occur all the time. So why now would I wonder such a thought over something so minor?
Let me share with you that I am in need of a minivan. I live in a one car family with a husband who works crazy long hours. My car is in poor condition and desperately too small. We cannot afford a minivan or second car at this time. Again, even that did not shake my faith.
So what did? I was certain that this car accident was the means God would use to provide a minivan. All of a sudden, I got this thought in my head that my car would be totaled and we would then have money to buy what we really needed. Based on that crazy thought I began to thank the Lord for what seemed to be a trial. Then the phone call came that that the car would be repaired. What? How could it be repaired? God and I had an understanding that this event was one of those blessings in disguises. This was a time when you would hear “All things come together for good for those who love the Lord” over and over as my story would be relayed. What happened to that perfect plan? You mean to tell me that my accident was simply an accident?
The problem was that my faith was placed in my idea of what God would do or how he would provide. My faith was based on my human thoughts and feelings. I was certain that having only one car it would never breakdown or get wrecked because God knew we needed it. Somehow typing that out makes that thought seems what it really is…immature and lacking an understanding of faith. Faith is not based on what we think God will do or why God allows something to happen. The mere questioning of why God allows or does not allow something is expressing a lack of faith. As humans we feel the need to know why God does not act in way we expect or we anticipated. We console ourselves with“everything happens for a reason” when in fact we want to determine that reason.
When God does not seem to conform to our will we become dejected and disappointed. It often shakes us for awhile and manifests in a lack of faith or fear. We are to conform to God’s will and understand that he is always in control. Our head will understand that and know it to be true. However, our hearts betray and really we want God to conform and allow us the control over our own destiny. If God does not see fit to provide are we to question him? Are we not acting like Job’s friends who questioned the goodness of God during times of trial? You will find that even the smallest trials can shake our faith much the same way a paper cut can cause unexpected pain. If we truly submit and accept the will of God then we will not suffer a crisis of faith. The next time you are dejected or disappointed ask yourself if you expected God to do your will or if you are yielding to God’s will.
Copyright © Richele McFarlin, Moms of Faith, All Rights Reserved